Subtitle

Even if you are finally "cancer free" it will always be with you mentally

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Waiting...

Today being Christmas, it's a quiet day around here.  No relatives or close friends in the area.  So just Jack, Gunny and me.  I'm in my studio and Jack is catching up on some sleep/rest.  When I was married, years ago, I always lived away from family, being a military wife.  We always traveled around the holidays and I actually really wouldn't want to now.  Jack and I will have a duck and some trimmings for our Christmas feast.  We developed a taste for duck and goose a few years ago and try to have at least one or the other around the holiday months.

My PET scan was last Wednesday.  It wasn't stressful and as far as tests go, pretty easy.  I haven't heard anything regarding the results but expect to sometime this week.  If I let the scared part of my brain take over, I feel the reason I didn't hear anything yet was because its bad news and my doctor didn't want to ruin my holiday.  But I'm trying to keep a positive attitude through this and so my story is....the results were not in yet and/or the doctor's office wasn't open Friday.

Waiting for results is one of the worst parts.  The unknown can be scary and opens up the imagination to all sorts of scenarios.  And I have an excellent imagination, if I want to scare myself silly.  I talked with Jack yesterday about my feelings and stressed that I'm trying to keep negativity out of my life right now, in all forms.  A difficult task when living with a person who sees the glass as half empty.  But Jack will do his best to let me see the world as filled with angels and pixie dust, hope and miracles, as difficult as it is for him.

He really does take good care of me.  I'm the bread-winner in this relationship.  He's home all day and keeps things going, as much as his disabilities allow.  His first thought is always of my comforts and needs.  I'm pretty lucky to have a guy like that.  He can be a grumpy old man, but I can be pretty difficult to handle sometimes.  He knows that I'm happiest in my studio and does everything in his power to see that I can spend as much time down here are possible.  My worries are far from my mind when I'm creating.

So I will continue to wait for the results and handle whatever may come in the best way that I can.

1 comment:

  1. Waiting with you, Aunt Pat, and wishing for GOOD results. I'd love to see a picture of you and Jack sometime:).

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